you hate my love

u
mistake
my love. u
can’t even grasp
the depth of it. you
don’t know what it does
to me. you will never know.
you will never understand my
craving, my needs or my ways. or
what I must attain with this love. you
hate that i love. you hate the magnitude of
my love. you hate how my love challenges you.
you hate that you can’t love like i love. you hate how
it sends me into a dreamy state away from where you are.
you hate that it throws me into a raging melancholy, lost in it,
unable to function in your world, for days. you think it’s weird. lazy.
stupid. and just like the average person who gets told an uncomfortable
truth, you’ll attempt to destroy this loves purveyor. and you will be
mad with venom in doing this. you despise the books I read. u
loath my art. the things I write and the words I say. they’re
painful to you. you don’t know where I come up with
this stuff. you’ve never gazed in at your own soul,
let alone the eyes of one who is fixed with this
furious love. your love is scared of the dark,
my love rejoices in it. my love is rapture.
my love is daring. my love doesn’t
yield to security. my love is
free. your love is ruled. my
love feeds the world.
your love dies
with you.and
you hate
it

Reflections on Nature, Mankind and Resurrection

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The sun is just peering over the horizon as I sit here by this serene lake. I’m alone apart from for an older gentleman in the distance walking his dog. The tired oaks stand with dignity in their silence. The palms gently quiver from a light wind off the water. It is springtime here and you can smell the Jasmine in the breeze. On this quiet morning, dew lingers on the park benches, the leaves and the old wooden dock that reaches out to eternity. All around me you can hear nature come alive. It’s in these hours that we find what we usually spend a lifetime seeking. Liveliness. Peace.

As the gray morning is broken up by the sun’s powerful rays slicing through the overcast, the Great Heron swoops down inches from the water and sores back up to pose admirably on the old dock. The Belted Kingfisher, with its energetic flight, hovers just above the lake and then dives at his prey, disrupting the silence. Hundreds of crows chirp and flutter all around, playing, singing and looking for food on the shoreline. It’s musical. The world is asleep but nature is stirring with potent vitality. With all this life awakening, one wonders how this liveliness, this beauty, this existence could possibly have a beginning or an end. It seems infinite. It is I believe.

Sitting here drinking my coffee,  I’m questioning why people treat each other so harsh. In this vast majestic world we all reside in, why do we get bogged down and overtaken by trivial dramas and futile quarrels. Sitting here at this moment you realize, at least for an instant, that yesterday and tomorrow are illusions. They are nothing. Only right now is real, this moment. And it’s amazing when you recognize this; nature helps tremendously. When you sit as an observer in nature it un-teaches all that’s been taught, all that’s been conditioned in our minds; it chips away at all the opinions we’ve accumulated over the years, mostly from other people. Knowledge is always in the past.

When alone, and you empty yourself of everything, the past doesn’t cast its shadow. Past and future have no meaning. This is where it’s at. This is the nirvana that we seek.

What I’m finding out is that we learn more about life by watching the sunrise and the birds come alive, seeing and hearing the awakening of nature around us than we can by reading any book or ancient doctrine. There is truth here and you feel it in all your senses. I believe the poet William Blake understood this when he beautifully put these words together:

“To see a World in a Grain of Sand 
And a Heaven in a Wild Flower, 
Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand 
And Eternity in an hour.” 

Now the sun is dissipating the coolness of the morning. The warmth touches my face as the sun rises higher in the blue sky. The low hovering clouds that were prominent before sunrise have slowly disintegrated, giving way to a colorful morning.

I often wonder why we are all so serious. Why do we worry so much. Why do we live in a world of superficiality, walking around, fighting, bickering, and constantly at each other’s throats over the most trivial of matters. Why do we exalt in pride and our self-righteous beliefs. Why are we so susceptible in believing the most obvious falsehoods. Why do we live most of our lives asleep and what does it mean to be awake. These are the questions hitting me this morning.

To be fully alive, like what I’m seeing this morning by the lake, means living deliberately with dignity. It means finding joy and letting it engulf you. It means, as the words of Joseph Campbell come to mind, following your bliss. It’s about being who you are and not yielding to anyone or anything. Being truly alive is entering the woods where there is no path. It’s about making your own, leaving your own unique footprints on this heavily trampled earth. It means creating things that will outlive you. This is what being alive and living with purpose is all about.

A strong scent of orange blossoms hit me as a sudden wind came off the water. I sipped my coffee in the immense stillness of the morning. An abrupt sound of flailing wings from the heron taking flight turns my head. The sky has faded into a great coalescence of color and the light haze over the lake began lifting.

I think to myself how man has broken this earth. Tribalism, nationalism and religious idealism continues to wreak havoc on this planet. My flag is better than your flag. My God is the truth and your God is not. Mine mine mine is better than yours yours yours. This infantile mentality is the cause of everything evil in this world. We fight amongst each other while politicians exult in their power over the divided many. And religious leaders, with their devious power, implant a dangerous world outlook in the hungry minds that crave false hope to continue on. They create a world of duality, causing eyes to look at the world through the narrow lenses of good and evil.

These days, individuals don’t want to make their own decisions; they need someone in power to guide them. We look to authority figures for constant guidance. We rarely ever challenge or disobey. We strut along with full compliance, even to rules and laws that ruffle our conscious. People, robbed of their essence, are incapable of thinking beyond their provincial upbringing, unable to empathize with other humans that are unlike themselves. We put more trust in the corrupt institutions around us, whether it’s the state, academia or the church, than we do our own selves and our neighbors.

Unfortunately, with this unwavering trust in institutions, we’ve elevated to power the most depraved men in society. These are the same men who’ve tricked us into supporting the bloodshed of our fellow-man under the pretense of good verse evil. We are all saddened when a child is tragically killed but seem to be unfazed when the State does it with drone strikes under the language of war. We tend to compartmentalize our morality and feelings, detaching ourselves from what’s really going on, in hopes of living guilt free in our own little world, refusing to accept our indirect responsibility for these crimes.

Mankind is not inherently evil, but if somehow we can be convinced that the prescribed evil is good, we’re sure to adopt and execute it. All of us believe that murder is evil, but if committed by one in uniform, it is praised and glorified. Stealing is wrong, but if done by politicians in the language of “for the greater good”, then it’s fine. Redefining evil through political language is how the ruling class gains control of the people, making them do what they want.

This leaves us at a place in life where living freely and harmoniously with all things is a far-reaching utopia. We’ve bought into what the great powers have wanted us to buy into—disunion and conflict. Politicians feed off of this division knowing the masses will misplace blame for the ills of society. The people in general, drunk on entertainment and ignorance, will find it difficult to uncover a cure for the spreading cancer of society because we ignore the source and only treat and complain about the symptoms. We live comfortably and securely in a world of falsehoods and hardly take the time to read and genuinely learn. Our wisdom today is gained through sound bites and headlines. We barricade ourselves behind comfy little lies and chastise those who speak truths. And with this bleak ignorance we’re incapable of seeing through the deliberate misinformation bombarded on us.

There is hope. I believe, like nature all around this morning, people are slowly coming alive. Questions are starting to be asked. Technology is making it harder and harder for these institutions to hide their atrocities. A ruling system that functions by political violence will surely implode. As soon as the majority adheres to the virtues of truth and wisdom, and reclaim the essence of individualism and freedom, change will ensue.

People now are starting to make their way to the lake shore. A photographer sets up on the dock to capture shots of the many birds. A couple walks hand in hand, taking in the beauty of the horizon over the lake. The chirps from the crows are louder and sun is now sprinkling its radiance on the water. The world is fully awake now, and I sit and watch this resurrection with complete emptiness.

Voting is Useless, Surprise, Surprise

A recent Princeton study supports my unconventional belief in the uselessness of voting in today’s rigged political system. They’ve concluded that the “American public actually have little influence over the policies our government adopts.” They go on to show that “policymaking is dominated by powerful business organizations and a small number of affluent Americans (elite class)”, which is exactly what Tocqueville predicted over a century ago. It’s worth checking out. http://goo.gl/w1R8xP

Today’s article in The Telegraph touched on this study and informed those who haven’t recognized what is in plain sight, “The US government does not represent the interests of the majority of the country’s citizens, but is instead ruled by those of the rich and powerful.” The article went on to say that “Researchers concluded that US government policies rarely align with the the preferences of the majority of Americans, but do favour special interests and lobbying organisations: ‘When a majority of citizens disagrees with economic elites and/or with organised interests, they generally lose. Moreover, because of the strong status quo bias built into the US political system, even when fairly large majorities of Americans favour policy change, they generally do not get it.’”

So what should be conclude?

America is a Corporatocracy ruled by sociopaths and self-serving dunces, all under the guise of democracy. And the people, befuddled in a reality show haze, will keep showing up at election time to put that little check in the box for the candidate that has lied to them the most. Maybe this time, they naively think, maybe this time, it will change.

This type of bizarre behavior reminds me of the words of  H. L Mencken, “Democracy is the worship of jackals by the jackasses.”

The system is broke not because of who is in office. It’s broken because the state is rooted in violence and functions through coercion and exploitation. The entire system must be abolished not reformed.

If we want to change the tide in this country, if we want to stop the senseless murders overseas with our money and in our name, if we want to stop the devaluation of our hard-earned money, stop the ravaging of our freedoms, stop politicians raping our bank accounts, if we want to stop the insane national debt that is sure to enslave our kids…

then,

I believe this is the only way. (Click here)

Until We Go Back

we didn’t desire any one thing, but we
did have a craving for it all.
we wanted the whole world
and nothing less.
we wanted the fields and the sky
the sun and moon, the stars
and the heavens and all the hells.

we lived for the moment.
in the moment.
to the moment.

I remember it often–
stars dripping their radiance
on naked backs
and the evening breeze
carrying the music of passion
through moonlit pines.

midnight women with lipstick smiles
cigarette smoke lingering on tequila tongues
high heels held steady on rotating hips,
young eyes
perfumed back seats,
wild driving on lifeless streets.
hell yes,

yesterday and tomorrow
never materialized
in our minds,
we didn’t worry or regret
we just lived,

never tired after worn out miles
romancing on rainy nights
with mischievous smiles
seduced by 3 days of drunkenness
with Gomorrah eyes on dreamy faces

hand in hand wobbling
around cobble-stone streets
damp from tears
of winos on corners
under street lamps
sipping beers.

the horizon in the distance
was always blurred
and the cold walls of duty
did not confine us,
we were never tormented
by expectations,
we didn’t live dormant
running from temptations,
no, man

we were beautifully mad,
the only fruitful way
to be in a parasitical world
that feeds off of your everything.

the only way.

yes, it is all so clear

displaced we are, confused
in a land of hindrance, where every
move is determined by opinions
of empty minds.

we must go back.

break free.

our minds are
a cellar that confines us.

we must break free
and go back.

this world will continue
to be a prison…

until we go back
until we go back
until we go back

Alone

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From childhood’s hour I have not been
As others were—I have not seen
As others saw—I could not bring
My passions from a common spring—
From the same source I have not taken
My sorrow—I could not awaken
My heart to joy at the same tone—
And all I lov’d—I lov’d alone—
Then—in my childhood—in the dawn
Of a most stormy life—was drawn
From ev’ry depth of good and ill
The mystery which binds me still—
From the torrent, or the fountain—
From the red cliff of the mountain—
From the sun that ’round me roll’d
In its autumn tint of gold—
From the lightning in the sky
As it pass’d me flying by—
From the thunder, and the storm—
And the cloud that took the form
(When the rest of Heaven was blue)
Of a demon in my view—
~Edgar Allan Poe~